QUIP - Quick, Understanding, In Private.
Ask the person to talk privately, recognize what you did, apologize, and move the hell on. People too often make the apology about yourself and not about apologizing. Just say “I’m sorry I used the wrong pronouns, that was shitty of me, I’m working on it.” If it’s too awkward to ask them to speak in private, apologize right when you screw up, correct yourself, and then MOVE ON. Often, apologizing in a group can bring up anxieties about being outed, so the smart thing to do is just two words, “-sorry! She …” and then continue with what you were saying.
Cis isn’t a pronoun, friend. It’s a description. The fact that you didn’t know that (or that it comes from science and Latin, not from out of one of our asses) means you should do a little research into trans issues before you go to a rant page made for people to vent and make it all about you.
You have the right to say no whenever you want. Anything else is nothing short of rape. Period.
Whether or not your refusal comes from transphobia is not an issue when asking whether or not you have the ability to remove consent at any time. And I don’t even think you’re really being transphobic - liking/not liking a body part is just a matter of preference. Just ask yourself this - would you date a trans guy who had a penis? If you still wouldn’t, then it isn’t the guy’s biology that’s changing your opinion and you want to do some deep thinking on why that is. If not, you’re not being transphobic, you just have a preference for dick.
Regardless, you can tell whoever is telling that to you that I’d like to explain to them what rape is and what rape culture is.
… seriously? Have you seen a newspaper recently? Our government is spying on it’s citizens, actively killing people of color and letting trans/LGB people die in the streets. Homelessness and poverty are being ignored systematically, rape culture is the basis of law, a massive lack of basic medical coverage extends beyond expensive emergency medicine options and our social welfare net is so full of holes that a lot of the time it does more harm then good; these are day to day realities for non-white cis males, and even in some cases for them too. And THEN you get to the fucked up things that people are doing to trans people, and the government’s mix of ignoring and participating doesn’t seem to help the problem much.
And that’s just on a good day.
Not to mention IT DOESN’T NEED TO COME FROM THE GOVERNMENT FOR IT TO BE OPPRESSIVE. Society itself can be oppressive. So even if the government wasn’t oppressive, we’re still under the boot.
So no, I won’t and can’t agree with this statement.